Forgive me this indulgence but when you have so many photos of such a special day, one cannot help but share them. This is for anyone curious about our wedding in Provence.

When Robin Proposed with a thyme sprig in December of 2023 while we were on a walk in the Alpilles, the first thing we thought about was that the perfect, dreamiest location would be to get married in an olive grove. These trees are such a large part of our lives, I paint them, we planted 7 in the garden last year (which is fitting because at Provençal weddings an olive tree is often planted), we hike between their rows on the weekend and dream about making our own oil. That night, we asked our friends William and Prune at Les Terres de Pierre if they would allow us to get married amongst their oliviers. Thankfully, they whole-heartedly agreed. It also helps that William is an excellent chef!

A DIY Wedding in Provence

In many ways this was a DIY wedding. This was obviously for budget reasons; also, we felt it was more meaningful to do things ourselves (despite the running around and stress this created on the day of).

A Garden Rose Dream

I used to work in a upmarket florist during my university years in Montréal. I absolutely loved the experience and daily creativity it offered. So, I could have made large floral arrangements if I wanted. However, we were going for a more country feel appropriate to our Provençal farmhouse venue. The original plan was to have masses of garden roses from a local producer in the region. The price was amazing, the roses spectacular (the same roses used by royal member of the Monaco family Charlotte Casiraghi) and quite frankly it was all too good to be true. A month before our wedding we experienced rainstorms that wiped out the roses.

When reality sets in

We ended up ordering the flowers directly through a contact of mine on the Saint Remy de Provence market (I worked there for a few years). That was another tricky hurdle as the flowers, though “wild” looking, are uncommonly sold on the market and considered “noble” flowers. They had to be ordered in specially. Despite my desire for David Austin roses (at such a price even if just for the bouquet) my friend on the market refused to get them and replaced them instead with local gorgeous varieties. I didn’t get the exact colours I ordered but alas, it didn’t matter. At the last minute we had to embrace the colour yellow. The macaroons we ordered were supposed to be peach but came out yellow, the peach roses were yellow, extra tablecloths came from the back of cupboards in the colour yellow, it just seemed like that colour was meant to be!

Flowers (in addition to some wild fennel we picked) : Camomile Matricaire, French garden roses, Thlaspi, Scabiosa, some Cosmos from our garden, and Ammi.

Making the Ceramic Vases

I lovingly made all the ceramic vases for the tables myself. We bought an iron arch and decorated it simply with olive branches with the intention of installing the arch in our garden on a permanent basis. All of the olive oil labels were hand-written and we bought all the drinks ourselves from our favourite local wineries (Deves, Domaine des Blaquières) and fruit juice producers.

The Rehearsal Dinner

We had a dinner the evening before the wedding where we invited only the people from out of town. Which, was just about everyone! My bachelorette was two nights before the wedding with people coming to the party straight from the airport. There were so many nationalities. It was blissful chaos.

Bonsaï olive trees from the market and Poterie Not ceramics were (we thought) a perfect rustic table setting under the fig trees for the night before. I wore a daisy crown that I made with dried daisies (a surprise for Robin, he likes daisies) and he wore a Souleiado shirt (of course!).

Community

We were so grateful for our friends that crossed oceans to be with us on our special day. We tried to keep the wedding as small as possible, with only 45 people. It felt meaningful that everyone chipped in to help decorate, move chairs, etc. Each person had a different role. My oldest friend officiated, my childhood hairdresser from Canada did my hair, my friend Loretta did my makeup, our witnesses were different from the best man and woman, my stepfather walked me down the aisle and my mom tied the knot for our hand fasting.

Creating Meaning with details

In France, in order for your marriage to be legally binding you have to get married at your local town hall. This disappointed me a little. In France, people often go to the town hall first and then the church. I would have preferred a secular ceremony to be both legally binding and in the outdoors.

Our families are small and don’t have strong wedding traditions. Robin and I both like to make decisions based on what we really want rather than just going with a precedent. This can be exhausting, constantly evaluation your intentions, but it’s worth it. We made a conscious decision to create meaning through details, and even create potential family heirlooms.

A Feather Boutonnière

Robin’s boutonnière was made by Prune, owner of the property with William but also an artist plumassière. This is the trade of feather worker, of which there are only 7 left in France. She has worked for the big fashion houses in Paris as well as the army (high-ranking officers have feathers details on their uniforms) but she now works for herself from her home atelier (studio) and boutique in Maussane les Alpilles. This is a boutonnière to keep.

A Nod to French History & a Vintage Tiara

Another detail was the crown I wore. This is something I hope to pass down eventually. It was made by Lizeron in Paris. The detailed ceramic designs are based on vintage French wedding tiaras that were originally made of wax.

A Sense of Place & Terroir

The wedding favours were peppery olive oil made on the property as well as native wildflower seeds. We were so grateful to be married in the regional Park of the Alpilles. Our hearts and lives are here. This was also reflected in the food, all local ingredients and organic wine made by small producers.

Imperfect Rings

We searched all over for wedding rings that had an organic form. We wanted them reflect nature, the imperfection of a life tied to someone else, how things ebb and flow. Something that reminded us of roots, growing together and knobbly olive tree bark. We found them in England (Cumbrian Designs).
The vintage (1910) daisy Marguerite engagement ring was found after a lot of research and a subsequent mission in Paris where we spent a weekend visiting antique jewellery shops.

A Bespoke Suit

My late father spent his career designing the patterns of suits. All throughout my childhood I would flick through the swatches he carefully pinned together on large sheets of paper. In addition to this, Robin’s complexion and my pickiness of colour meant that finding a suit was tricky. I went to 2 stores for my wedding dress, but we went to several for his suit! In the end, he had it custom made in Paris (by Chris von Martial). If you’re only going to have one bespoke suit made, it might as well be for your wedding!

*Apparently in France the men go suit shopping together. We didn’t know this and Robin was teased by his French friends for going with me instead. Ha!

Une Cérémonie Entre les Oliviers

How do you create new traditions? How do you bring meaning without precedent? How do you make something unique to you? How do you honour people that couldn’t make it? Neither of us are religious but we are absolute romantics…

Here’s how we added meaning :

• Private vows just for each other at sunrise on the morning of the wedding (Robin’s idea)
• Songs that nodded to my late father and Robin’s late mother horribly passed away 5 months before the wedding (we didn’t tell anyone- made a couple people cry- it was a if you know you know kind of situation)
• A ring warming ceremony where everyone present passes the rings from person to person, each silently offering a wish, hope or blessing for our couple.
• We had quite a few vows, the more traditional ones were said separately, the second, more personal set were said together, at the same time, which somehow felt magical
• Handfasting as a symbol of our union ; “as the hands are joined, they form an infinity symbol, representing eternal union—a continuous circle of love, trust, and respect.”
• Group declaration of support. We wanted to include everyone there as a witness : “As part of this esteemed group, I invite everyone to join me in expressing your support for the couple. So, if you are able, please answer the following question with “we will.” As Ashley and Robin’s blood and chosen family, will you share their joys, help them to bear their burdens, and do everything in your power to uphold them in their life together?”

“Olive trees are a symbol of peace and resilience—qualities deeply embodied in this
relationship. Just as the olive tree thrives in all seasons, Ashley and Robin’s union has
and will continue to be nourished by their mutual respect and enduring commitment to
one another.” – our celebrant & my childhood friend

We asked Leonard to play for us during the apéritif. Our French friends laughed that our menu was more Provençal than any they’ve ever seen!

Vows

In addition to the usual “to have and to hold…” we added these :

I promise to respect and appreciate you for who you are and who you wish to become.
I promise to seek a deep understanding of your wishes, your desires, your fears, and
your dreams.
I promise to be your safe haven when you need me, whenever you need me.
I promise to nurture your goals and ambitions; to support you through misfortune and
celebrate your victories.
I promise to keep our lives exciting, adventurous, and full of passion.
I promise to treat you with compassion over fairness, because we are a team.
I promise to persevere when times get tough, knowing that no matter how many
challenges we might face, we will always overcome them together.
I promise to show you, every day, that I know exactly how lucky I am to have you in my
life.

A Cake for England, A Cake for France

We had 2 takes to acknowledge both Britain and France (sadly had not many ideas for Canada).

We actually decided to go very old fashioned for both cakes. Traditional British fruit cake (there’s an excellent boozy one made by a lady in Saint Remy- all proceeds go to charity- contact me if you want her number) and a traditional Pièce Montée (choux buns with nougatine). Delicious!

And Afterwards…

After dinner we danced until 4am..
*tip : one way to get absolutely everyone to dance is to get everyone to stand around you during the first dance then throw on some upbeat tunes right afterwards.

After a wedding week of celebrations, trying to make the most of our time with everyone, dealing with other people’s emotions, we collapsed in content exhaustion. It took months to process everything.

Robin declared last week on our honeymoon in Sri Lanka (5 months later) “Let’s do it all again” !

With pleasure love. xo

“I give you this ring as a symbol of my love,
my trust in our strength together,
and my promise to learn and grow with you.”